i prayed to the moon

I prayed with a stillness and peaceful resolve
I want him. I am ready for him, I said.
He who will see me, who will hold my raw heart in his hand
who will notice my sincere longing to receive.
        To give. To surrender.

Sometimes the path to what you want
is littered with landmines and illusions of the mind
Things to make you prove that you are ready
That you will be able to hold this gift
That you will see the sacred in his eyes
        with reverence and humility
and never forget you prayed for him.

Walking through, hand in hand
with your embodied prayer
running into the voices you grew up with
He won’t stay, they say
She will cross his path and he will follow her scent
There is no way you can hold him
        you are not worthy.

One by one, with him at my side
        we slay them
with his purifying love, with the permission he grants
with his purposeful devotion and humble gratitude
He silences those voices and brings forth
a woman who walks on the firm foundation of love.

I have nowhere else to be
He is my home.